Monday, September 15, 2014

The Audacity Of Authors

While attending a recent writers conference I overheard a woman say “That author's ego is really out of control.” The catty remark was aimed at an author who did seem pretty full of himself. But it got me to wondering: Is there room for humbleness when it comes to writing?

The dictionary definition of “humble” is “Not proud or haughty, not arrogant or assertive; offered in the spirit of deference or submission; ranking low in a hierarchy or scale; insignificant; lacking all the signs of pride.” Does this sound like the traits a successful writer?

The simple act of putting pen to paper or fingertips to keyboard announces to the world, “I have something to say. My thoughts are unique. My words are important!” That mindset is what drives writers, convinces them every day to sit in a chair and hope for the flow of ideas that will translate to the right words on the page. This is what deprives them of family time, TV time, sleep, and their favorite past time, reading. This is what makes them snap at people, growl at interruptions, overeat and add fat to their butt.

So, from where does this “arrogance” spring? I can only speak for myself: I'm inspired by the scribes before me. Shakespeare, Chaucer, Homer (not Simpson—Doh!). Their words lasted centuries—will mine do the same? In the lightening pace of today's plugged-in world, is it possible for my words to last longer than the next tweet?

Writers have to be overly proud of what we're doing—and yes, I'm in the non-humble crowd. We are out there trying for truth and recognizing it our fellow authors. Ego and belief in ourselves is what shores up our confidence when family members look skeptical at our efforts. Friends encourage us with pats on the back as if we've just escaped from a mental institution. Authors are strangers, not people they know.

We struggle alone and wait for the spark, that “Aha!” moment when our consciousness takes a giant leap onto the page. That's the moment when the pleasure of writing is transformed to the power of writing. There's no turning back.

The next hurdle is ignoring the censor in your head that says “Can I write what I really feel and get away with it?” Don't look for the green light from family and friends. They're already worried you're going to spill the dirty laundry. You can't wait to write until Granny and her church friends die.

On my list of the most daring, soul-barring authors I've come across are Philip Roth, who never let me look at liver the same way again. James Joyce, whose run-on sentences go on for pages. Joan Didion slouching toward Bethlehem. Erica Jong diminished my Fear of Flying. I never understood a word of Henry Miller's Cancers but am incensed that he was censored. Anais Nin who opened up her sexuality for public viewing. And my favorite author, Chuck Palahniuk, always makes me want to write brave, to bare my soul, not bar it.

I tell beginning writers that they must always stand by their words because critics are out there ready to tear them apart. Break new ground, break down barriers. Take old ideas and turn them around like a prism until they see light from another angle. Find their voice and use words that excite. What I don't tell them is in the process they're going to cut their emotional wrists and bleed all over the page. It's messy and some aren't going to survive.

6 comments:

Charles Gramlich said...

I tend to have raging self doubt myself.

Dac said...

I got over it long ago. Sing loud. Dance like you're Astaire. laugh at yourself.

Liane Spicer said...

My writing ego is bi-polar. Some of the time it's got Charles's raging self doubt and it just wallows in despair. The rest of the time it thinks it's a misunderstood genius. At least I keep the latter locked away before it injures itself--or until the next downswing begins.

Linda Thorne said...

I've looked at this post a number of times and avoided it. I have to admit that I started off writing, thinking I was really good; thus, embarrassing myself galore. Then I went the opposite direction. When my book was good, I couldn't believe it. I was still so deflated, I was trying to find friends I could pay to critique my book. I didn't want to publish an embarrassment. When I asked Sunny Frazier to read it for money, she knew about the contests I'd finished as a finalist in. She told me it was time to start submitting it and that worked. My ego is back, but I'm still timid. I'll find out how I'll react when my debut novel, now under a publishing contract, is released.

Nancy LiPetri said...

Great post. I keep reminding myself my story won't be everybody's "cup of tea." It helps to keep hearing the experienced authors talk about inevitable bad reviews and other ego-bruising aspects of getting published. Love Dac's comment--and if we can get a few others to laugh with us, understand us, we've succeeded at least on some level :) Thanks for keeping it real!

Augie said...

I never considered that I was brave in writing...the fearlessness comes when I'm critiqued...that's okay...I learned...still learning to hone the craft of writing (holy crap batman that was a lot of ellipses used)