Today it is my pleasure to host author and screenwriter Bob Bernstein who is going to discuss dealing with rejection or “Thank You for Completely Trashing My Work You No-Nothing Piece of...”
Bob Bernstein is a
former executive fundraiser turned professional boat captain. He has worked as
a commercial fisherman, charter boat skipper, captain-for-hire, camera boat
operator, and boat wrangler for Hollywood. His technical marine articles,
columns, short stories and features have appeared in magazines and books since
1987. The novellas, Beneath Cold Seas and Mother Lode - first serialized in
Offshore Magazine in 1992 - are available at Amazon's Kindle Store, as is
Bernstein's memoir, What They Don't Tell You About Alzheimer's, an informative
story about taking care of a mother with Alzheimer's Disease. What They Don't
Tell You About Alzheimer's held the top two spots on Amazon's Top 100 Kindle
Books on Aging for over seven weeks and rose to the top 25 on Amazon's Top Ten
100 Memoirs.
Stowaway, the sequel to
Bernstein's debut mystery novel, Calamity, is due out in late 2014, as is his
science fiction thriller, The Ring Shepherd.
Are We Sinking Or Are
My Legs Getting Shorter is a "light read" collection of instructional
articles and anecdotes for new and novice boat enthusiasts, while the
experienced vessel or fleet owner will find a more thorough examination of boat
systems, equipment, and gear in Boat Tech.
Bernstein continues to
work on the waters of Penobscot Bay, Maine. He writes from his home in Tenants
Harbor. For more information visit him at www.amazon.com/author/rgbernstein.
•••••••
Ninety-nine percent of all
critiques or rejections have the word “but” in the very first sentence. I got
one once from the Scott Meredith Agency. It was beautiful. Five pages long. The
opening was something like, “This impressive, ambitious work moves like a
runaway freight train, catapults the reader into a phantasmagorical world of
outlandish visions and scenery, but is ultimately flawed and will never go
anywhere.”
Another rejection letter started
out: “Your manuscript was exactly what I was looking for, and I argued strongly
for it to be added to our book list, but my editorial staff thought otherwise.”
My favorite came from Tom
DeFalco, at the time, Editor-in Chief of Marvel Comics. It was on his
personalized business stationary, the one with Spider Man web-slinging up the
left side. Typical letter. Dear Mr. Bernstein, and then under that the word Huh in
quotes. Hand signed, Tom DeFalco.
I love that letter, even though
it doesn’t have the word “but” in it, and I will cherish it as long as I live.
Granted, it lacks a certain detail. But consider the refined brevity. The
nuance. The pure, unadulterated passion. Obviously, I had really hit a nerve.
These days, with self- and indy
publishing, the rejection letter isn’t as commonplace, unless you send one to
yourself.
Dear Mr. Bernstein,
Your recent manuscript reads
like a cross between Sons and Lovers and Honey I Shrunk the Kids.
All of us here at Bernstein and Bernstein Publishing loved it. BUT,
unfortunately, we just accepted a similar book titled, Honey, I Shrunk
Tolstoy. So, sorry. Good luck placing your work elsewhere.
Signed,
Bob Bernstein
Publisher
Oh, well. Back to the drawing board.
••••••
Also, just in time for St. Patrick's Day, you can pick up your free copy of The Cannibals of Madison County by clicking HERE. Hope you enjoy!
7 comments:
Dear Mr Bernstein,
That made me laugh. A lot. That letter from Tom DeFalco is priceless; I hope you've got it framed in your lavatory.
My special subject at college was the Tudor navy. It was a mistake though as really I have no interest in boats whatsoever.What a pity:))
Kind regards,
Jane Turley
Lol. Thanks for the comment. And I envy you your disinterest in boats. Think of all the money you save.
Gotta love that "huh"
I still have a folder full of my old rejection letters. I need to write more so I can add some new ones.
WIlliam, I keep mine in a leather bound binder. But there's a lot of other stuff in there, too. One particular item, a cutout from the Boston Globe from their "Literary Life" section, which pays tribute to noteworthy books, articles, etc., includes a blurb about me that goes something like:
"Bob Bernstein, in an incredibly detailed feature article for National Fisherman magazine, gives us a comprehensive look at the growing sea urchin fishery in the U.S., including more than we ever wanted to know about the sex habits of sea urchins."
Not my fault spiny sea urchins like to swing.
Welcome back, Bob.
Mine are in a file that I haven't looked at in years, but none of them can rival that "Huh." Wow. That's definitely a keeper.
Thanks for having me. It's nice to be back. I haven't looked at my folder in a long time, either. There are some real doozies in there for sure, and also some great advice. God bless those thoughtful editors and producers who cared enough to send more than just a form letter.
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